My sister Kelsey is addicted to salt.
I mean to the point where my mom had to buy her own salt shaker because the one in the kitchen would show up "missing." Kelsey's favorite snack?: the pretzel salt at the bottom of the bag. She can't even wait until all the pretzels are gone! Her grubby little mits work their way down into the bottom of the bag (usually splitting the bag down the middle) to get her hands on it.
One day, about 30 minutes before mom was due home from work, Kelsey ripped the pretzel bag right down the middle causing the salt to shower all over the floor and couch cover. "DAMN IT!" In a frenzy to clean before mom came home (because she knows she'll get in trouble for eating so much salt) Kelsey gets the vacuum cleaner and goes to town on the couch cover.
All the sudden I heard a noise like the vacuum was clogged, and sure enough, the couch cover was getting sucked right into the vacuum. Understandably, Kelsey pulls the cover out of the vacuum hole and... POP! Like a little trampoline, the cover bounces and sends all the pretzel salt right into Kelsey's face (even worse, in her eyes!).
In a frantic panic, Kelsey starts running around the living room screaming and pulling her eyelids, screaming "IT BURNS!!! THE SALT!" I could literally see the salt crystals dissolving on her poor eyes.
It may seem cruel, but this was by far the funniest chain of events I had ever seen.. I still can't think about it without laughing.. and that day, like a cruel big sister, I was on the floor basically crying because I couldn't contain myself.
I will never look at salt the same.
I miss you girls :(